Cold
by ThePaintedSkies
Summary: Natsume brushes Mikan away. He's too afraid to tell her good bye, beacause of all he's done. One Shot. Tragedy. Rated T For some language and Character Death. Song Fic: Cold by Crossfade. R&R Greatly appreciated, let me know what you think. :


**Disclaimer: I don't own Gakuen Alice, much to my dismay. Boo.**

_-Cold-_

"Natsume!" Mikan Sakura ran, her auburn pigtails bouncing, the curls at the tips furling and unfurling as she made a mad dash towards me.

I was ailing, leaned against the usual cherry blossom tree we killed time under. The tree I always frequented. I was bleeding profusely through various wounds, gritting my teeth from the pain.

Another mission that went unwell. I perked up my bobbing head as I heard the familiar high pitched wail growing closer. When I looked up, she was already walking up to me at a slow pace, staring at all the damage done. Tears brimmed in her eyes as she fell to her knees, her chocolate orbs staring into my crimson ones. I'm pretty sure the gleam from wanting tender affection was obvious, but I bit it back. My mouth processed everything differently. "_What the hell do you want_?" I questioned her icily. She twitched a little, but the resolve hadn't dissipated.

_Looking back at me I see_

_That I never really got it right_

_I never stopped to think of you_

_I'm always wrapped up in_

_Things I cannot win_

"Natsume…" Mikan lifted her hands to cup my face. She examined me, probably wishing she could make it all go away. That maybe she could help me shoulder the pain.

I watched as she ran a finger along my jaw line. I wanted to succumb and hold on to her tightly. I inhaled sharply.

_You are the antidote that gets me by_

_Something strong_

_Like a drug that gets me high_

"Natsume…" Mikan whispered again. She continued to run her finger along the features of my face. She knitted the eyebrows, worried. The expression on my face, I could feel that it probably seemed pained. Her palm was rested against my cheek.

It's now or never. I have to get this over with.

"Don't touch me!" I slapped her hand away, looking at her with a scowl. She jumped back, confused. "Don't you ever put your hands on me!"

_What I really meant to say_

_Is I'm sorry for the way I am_

_I never meant to be so cold. _

"What's wrong?" Mikan asked, taken aback by my outburst. "Did something happen during-"

"No. God, you're so nosy. So damn annoying."

_To you, I'm sorry about all the lies._

I still felt the want. My stomach was twisting. I damned myself.

"This isn't the time for that Natsume! You're hurting!" Mikan yelled at me.

"This? It's nothing." I dismissed.

Mikan now furrowed her brows. "I don't mean only physically."

I glared at her. "I'm not weak. I'm not hurt. I'm fine."

"Sure, that's believable." Mikan said rather flatly. I flinched slightly.

Did she think I was weak?

_Maybe in a different light_

_You could see me standing on my own again_

Or…did she know that I was nothing without her?

"Don't talk about it like you know anything about me." The scowl was back on my face.

_Cause now I can see_

_You were the antidote that got me by_

_Something strong like a drug that got me high_

"Natsume dammit, what has gotten into you?!" Mikan was now frustrated, gripping the hem of her skirt to keep herself composed.

"You. You're annoying. Trying to change people aren't you? To be more like you? People don't change. It's hopeless. You're pathetic." I droned on.

Tears now freely fell from the brunette's eyes. I felt a pang on my heart. "Natsume? What's wrong? Why are you doing this?"

"Because…"

_What I really meant to say_

_Is that I'm sorry for the way I am_

_I never meant to be so cold_

_I never meant to be so cold._

"I want you to get out of my life." I demanded. Mikan began to tremble.

_I never really wanted you to see_

"Why…Why Natsume?!"

"Because I hate you."

_The screwed side that I keep_

"I hate your God damned guts."

_Locked deep inside of me so deep_

"So much, that I wish you could just disappear off the face of the earth. I wish you would just _die_."

_It always seems to get to me_

"You heard me, _SAKURA_. OUT!" I hollered, sparking a flame from underneath her.

Mikan jumped up, then stared at me, tears still pouring from her eyes. She hesitated, before running off.

_I never really wanted you to go_

"Bravo, Hyuuga." A voice sneered.

"Are you satisfied now, Persona?" I growled as I shifted. The tree was not providing any source of comfort to my bleeding back.

_So many things you should have known_

"Not quite." Persona mused, hopping off of a branch he was perched on and approached me, smirking. "I've no use for a dying kitten." Persona wrapped his finger around my wrist, slowly infecting me with his curse. "Now I am…" he let out a laugh before walking away, leaving me here to my demise.

I smirked and laughed dryly. "I deserve this much."

_I guess for me there's just no hope_

_I never meant to be so cold_

"I'm sorry… Mikan…" Slowly, I lost consciousness, letting myself slip to the side and onto the grass. If I was lucky, I'd die over night from blood loss.

_What I really meant to say_

_Is that I'm sorry for the way I am_

_I never meant to be so cold_

My eye lids were heavy, but I managed to get them open. Guess I hadn't died yet. I looked at my skin. Seems Persona's mark of death spread relatively quickly. The bastard. He wanted to be sure I died.

I made no effort to sit up. I knew I only had moments. My breath was already short and quick. It was extremely difficult to breathe. My chest was hot and felt like it'd shut down any moment. I examined what I could from where I lay and saw Mikan walking with Ruka.

Just like it always should have been.

They looked worried. Maybe Mikan mentioned my injures and they checked the infirmary this morning. Ruka, yes, It'd make sense for him to check around. But Mikan? I said I hated her guts venomously not too many hours ago.

Wait a second. She seemed happy for a moment there. She smiled.

I let a small smile take over my pallid face as I felt my body begin to shut down.

"I'm glad you'll help me talk to Natsume, Ruka! That makes me so happy!" Mikan called out relatively loudly.

Shit. She was looking for me.

"He was acting really weird… and he's so injured too right now… I hate when he doesn't go to the doctor and just patches himself up." Mikan put her hands on her hips for emphasis.

She was gorgeous, and lively, as usual.

Ruka chuckled. But then he turned and narrowed his eyes. Scrutinizing something. His eyes then widened with fear. He pointed in my direction. Double shit. I'm dying, my body discolored. I'm swimming in my own damn blood as well. Life can't be so cruel. I can't say good bye like this.

Mikan turned to my direction as well now, worry on her face, tears spilling as she began running to me.

A smile graced my lips as my eyes became heavy, a tear sliding onto the dirt. The last tear I'll ever spill. Her visage became blurry as my eyes slowly closed. I'll die knowing she cared deeply for me. That she loved me. I pray she finds happiness, as all I've ever given her was a hard time. Sadness. There was nothing I could do for her with this life of mine… So I'll let it be taken away, so she can truly find happiness… _Good bye Mikan…_

_What I really meant to say_

_Is that I'm sorry for the way I am_

_I never meant to be so cold._


End file.
